Recently I read that Sen. Obama’s wife was criticized for saying that she only recently felt that she was proud to be an American. For some reason, people in this country are threatened when someone might not be proud to be an American. But how can anyone be proud to be something they just “are.” I’ve never understood that. I was born in this country, not because I chose it but because my ancestors chose it. Does that make me proud to live here? Not really. I happened to be born within a set of boundaries that some strangers in the past set up. Deos that make me better than someone born on the other side of the boundary, or within a different set of boundaries across the ocean? Of course not. Being born in a particular area does not make you special, and it shouldn’t give you reason for being proud.
In fact, in the past few years, especially since George Bush came into office, I think I’ve been more embarrassed to be an American than proud. I wouldn’t say I’m ashamed to be an American, because again, I’m not ashamed of something that I didn’t choose to be. But I know that other countries look at the United States and the people who live here in a very negative light because of decisions a few people have made. I didn’t make those decisions, but sometimes I guess I’m embarrassed to, as an adult, have chosen to remain in this country.
How can someone be proud of living in a country where 1 in 100 people are in prison? That either means that we have a lot of people in prison for crimes that don’t deserve hard time or that Americans are a society where crime is just a part of life. I am not proud to live where people don’t know the difference between right and wrong, where people feel somehow entitled to have certain things, and if they don’t have those things, they need to get them illegally.
I am not proud to live in a country where children now feel it’s okay to use guns to get their points across. School shootings are almost not “news” anymore. It’s becoming a way of life, and it’s embarrassing. Where are young people getting the idea that it’s okay. If someone wants to commit suicide, why do they think it’s okay to take others out with them?
I’m not proud to live in a country where people are coddled so much as children that they expect to be coddled as adults. And these same adults now feel that they can make a quick buck the minute something not so pleasant happens in their lives: lawsuits! Americans don’t want to work hard to make a living. They want to get everything the easy way. I’m not proud that this country runs on lawsuits, and I’m definitely NOT proud that there are times I’d like to make a quick buck without working hard myself. Hell, I play the lottery a lot, hoping to be given a whole lot of money so I won’t ever have to work hard.
I’m hugely embarrassed to live in a country where the leader (who was not elected by the popular vote, nor by MY vote) lied to start a war. I’m still waiting to find out where the WMDs are. I’m embarrassed that we’re now occupying Iraq with no real end in sight.
I’m embarrassed that leaders in this country feel like everything is our business. We need to keep our hands out of other country’s politics the way we would be horrified if another country tried to interfere with us.
But back to pride in general. Being proud of something you didn’t work for doesn’t make sense. Gay pride…what are they proud of? I cannot understand being proud that you’re gay (or straight or bi or whatever), but maybe they’re proud that they were strong enough to choose to live life the way they were meant to. Being gay and living publically as a gay person, with bigotry and discrimination, is not easy. So the pride should be in the way they choose to live their lives, not in the fact that they’re gay.
St. Patrick’s Day is coming up, and many Irish will talk about their Irish pride. I am Irish, but I’m not proud that I’m Irish. I didn’t choose it…I just am. I’m not proud that I’m female or that I’m straight. I’m not proud that I have 10 fingers and 10 toes (although I’m definitely happy about that). I’m simply not proud of those things that I did not choose, and it makes no sense for others to be proud of those things either.
What I’m proud of is who I’ve become as an adult. I’m a good person (most of the time). I try to be open minded. I am extremely self aware, and I am constantly trying to better myself. Many people have told me that they know I listen to criticism. Sometimes I can be defensive at first, but I’m always listening, and I take to heart what is being said, in case I really am at fault and need to try to be more understanding, more flexible, more sensitive to other’s situations. I always try to see arguments from both sides. I know that the person arguing with me believes they are right as much as I believe I am right.
I am proud that I am financially independent, living in a house that is paid off, with thousands of dollars in savings and no debt whatsoever. I’m REALLY proud of that because decisions I’ve made have made me financially secure in a time when so many others are in trouble.
I’m proud of myself when I succeed in meeting a challenge, in solving a puzzle, in finding a difficult answer. But I’m not proud that I have the ability to do all of this.
I think people need to figure out the difference of being proud and being happy or feeling lucky.
Although I’m sometimes embarrassed to be an American, much of the time, I’m grateful to be an American. I feel like I’m even lucky to live in a country where we have so many rights. I feel lucky to live where I do, where I’m not constantly afraid, where war is not outside my door. I am lucky and happy to have the family that I was born into and the husband that I married.
So I think it’s fine if Michelle Obama has had times where she hasn’t felt proud to be an American. Perhaps if her husband is elected and she helps him in his daily work, she can be proud of what she is helping other Americans achieve. In fact, if Sen. Obama weren’t proud of being an American, that might be a good thing. Perhaps if he were to become president, he would work hard enough so that he was proud of the job he was doing and we, as Americans, can be proud that we voted the right guy into office.
